Family Counseling

My mother and I do not agree at all, and we looked into the councils of the family for some time now. However, I am a bit worried about it because I am afraid that when I say nothing about what I feel, she'll tell me thats stupid or irrational, because thats what it normally does. I am also worried that my younger brother get into a position where it must choose sides between us, or I do not want to be taken seriously because I am the child, not the parent, and because my mother far been blaming me for everything that went wrong in our relationtionship. I know that I am part of the problem, but I do not think its fair for her to say that I am the problem. I was wondering if someone who had experience counseling of the family know how any of these issues could be addressed? Also, we would model a summary of family counseling, has anyone been successful in this regard?

I am training as a child and family psychologist, and have provided treatment supervised a number of families. I think your concerns are normal. If the therapist is not worth anything, they will not take sides. A family therapist is trained to see things as a system failure, not an individual failure. Every family is different and every relationship within this family is different, and therefore people need to adapt to who they face. In other words, if a parent acts in a way that a child, and it is great for that child, it does not mean that the interaction would even be good for another child. (Hope that makes sense).
The therapist must also be able to show your mothers blame on you, and should be able to keep your brother on the environment. Again, the tenant base of family therapy is that it's a system problem, not individuals. Moreover, when it's your turn to talk, the therapist must make your mother that respect, as it should make you listen to your mother.
It is good to admit that you are part of the problem but, again, but do not blame them, just look at how to change. Blame will not help. Fault does not help. Solutions do. If you're willing to change if your mother will follow suit, at least according to systems theory. Be ready to take the first step, even if the rest of your family is not ready. Even better is forcing them to change how they interact with you.
Go to therapy, it helps !!!!!

I do not have any expirenced councling before. but I think it would help!

Speak in a calm manner and be polite to your mother.
Let your feelings in a way where you will be heard in a heart felt way. Let them know how you like your mother.

family counseling, when done right, allows the function of the family better. In addition, family counselors tend to want to go back several generations as possible, because the mental health problems tend to be transmitted from generation to generation. The problem is usually with the parent and the child fell. Frankly, depending on what you said, your mother sounds verbal and emotional abuse in this case, your problems mothers are likely to be quite entrenched, and resistant to change. I would be surprised if brief counseling help in a situation of a parent always be verbal and emotional abuse.

I recommend reading the book, "The Witches of Salem Family" by Augustus Y. Napier and Carl Whitaker, available through Amazon and probably also through your local library.

My sisters and I had a counseling session with our mother for similar problems. The counselor was great. With moderation and helping to get the real issues on the table, he made sure he was interrupted and was also the person you were talking to reiterate what you said to ensure that the statement was included how to tell you to take. It was very h.